Incoming Transmission..........

It has come to the attention of P.H.A.T Command that the current captain of the U.S.S HANGRY is no longer fit for duty. 

Captain Jim's recent weight loss is causing an imbalance in the captain's chair resulting in massive malfunctions throughout the vessel. We have no clue whose bright idea it was to route all major systems through the captain's chair, but they did and now we must find a replacement quickly, before anything terrible happens to the lunch room!

Reminder to all Tubstronauts: 

You are allowed to submit only one request per chair upgrade. As of this morning we've received 68 requests for a cheeseburger button and... BING! You've Got Mail! 

ugh... seriously... stop... we get it.

>..........

In Star Chonk, you play as Cadet Norman, a recent recruit to the Tubstronaut program, and you can't believe this is actually happening. You finally have the chance to obtain what you've always dreamed of: a comfy chair with a gyroscope cup holder! Now all you have to do is knock all the other cadets off the holo-platform to collect the most Critical Mass. This should be easy. right?

Too bad all the other cadets want the captain's chair just as badly as you do. Luckily the science officer has a soft spot for chubby cadets and has offered to give you a few tips and tricks:

• Watch out for the other cadets quick dashes and butt slams
• Each time someone knocks another cadet out of the arena they will get bigger; making it harder for everyone to navigate within the smaller space
• Any cadet close to critical mass will have a digital hologram marking them
• The Holo-Platform hazards effect the arena and are noted with flashing lights
• Between rounds you can select a modifier that effects every cadets abilities

Key	Action
W	Move Forward
A	Move Left
S	Move Back
D	Move Right
SPACE	Dash
LEFT CTRL	Butt Slam

Commander PajamaPixie

Science Officer TheLoneK

Captain Cliffy

Weapons Expert Sweff

Rear Admiral DwunkyPengy